Gwen Defends Harajuku Girls

Gwen-Stefani-5-The-Harajuku-Girls2Gwen & Katy Perry must be BFFs or have the same publicist or image coach or something, because the delusion runs equally thick with these two. Throw Madonna in there and you got the Grand Trifecta of Asian-appropriating white women (with Avril Lavigne clutching at their coattails).

When recently asked by TIME Magazine if she regretted her whole “Harajuku Girls” fetish phase from 2004, Gwen gave a resounding:

“No…. For me, everything that I did with the Harajuku Girls was just a pure compliment and being a fan. You can’t be a fan of somebody else? Or another culture? Of course you can. Of course you can celebrate other cultures. That’s what Japanese culture and American culture have done. It’s like I say in the song [“Harajuku Girls”]: it’s a ping-pong match. We do something American, they take it and they flip it and make it so Japanese and so cool. And we take it back and go, “Whoa, that’s so cool!” That’s so beautiful. It’s a beautiful thing in the world, how our cultures come together. I don’t feel like I did anything but share that love. You can look at it from a negative point of view if you want to, but get off my cloud. Because, seriously, that was all meant out of love.

Oh yes, by “celebrate”, she means: shut up, get in back, and kowtow, sidekicks!

Screen Shot 2014-12-09 at 4.35.59 PMAnd “Get off my cloud”? AHAHAHAAA what foolery. So is she supposed to be an angel or goddess or something? Ridiculous as that sounds, Stefani may have just coined the new catchphrase for self-important pop co-opters (paging Iggy Iggy and Mileyyyyy). Oh, but it gets better:

“…They were dancers that were cast, but they became real. One girl was a Japanese girl that grew up in L.A., and she got to hang around with three different Japanese girls that were from different places in Japan and had different backgrounds. They became best friends, and she got to go to Japan and see her heritage and see how we are all the same.”

Because they weren’t real people to begin with, just mute, cutesy pets yeah? And Gwen’s basically saying, “YOU’RE WELCOME, HJG #3” and taking credit for helping one of her props dancers wake up and smell the matcha and connect with her Supaaa Kawaiiii peeeoopleessss.

But really this is not surprising, coming from someone with a long and illustrious bindi-wearing, “Indian Princess” cosplaying, Ska-appropriating history. And I almost ralphed when Gwen “BUKK BUKK BBUKK!!!”-ed through Anita Antoinette’s Bob Marley audition on The Voice. Ugh, take a seat and turn it back around.

via Dlisted

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The Most Baddest US Senator Gets His Due

Forgive me if I didn’t catch the Daniel Inouye storyline in Ken Burn’s The War. I only heard of the badassness of Inouye via Comedy Central’s all-too-good Drunk History series (have you read how the man lost his arm? I could never have imagined it was like THIS). Between marrying a Ford Foundation board chair and serving Hawaii for 58 years as an elected official, I can see no better way of having his legacy honored than being portrayed by the illustrious Steven Yuen of killing-zombies and dating-farmers-daughters fame. Enjoy, and we’ll surely be posting the other parts when they’re released:

This Year’s Recipient of Best Asian Themed Minor League Baseball Mascots goes to… The Vancouver Canadians

I’ve given some shit to the Milwaukee Brewers before for having a hot dog race that includes a Mexican themed hot dog wearing a sombrero. Yes. That was Milwaukee. But this here sushi race in at the Vancouver Canadians‘ stadium is downright awesome. Chef Wasabi is Cbruh’s favorite. But I can’t go against the avocado maki with the creeper smile. He wants that California Roll reeeaaalll bad. But in terms of the actual Sushi race, who has the leg up? Apparently Chef Wasabi has a huge ego and celebrates way to soon while he’s in the lead and ends up losing every time. Or pulling a “DeShaun Jackson” for short.

The Incredibly Asian Grandma

Courtesy of Ally Chandler, an aspiring actress (or so it seems), comes the adventures of The Incredibly Asian Grandma. Why is she incredibly Asian? Nothing really special, I guess AllyCat seems to think she’s hella Asian. But I know a busload of grandmas taking the San Jose to Thunder Valley gambling bus that would think otherwise… Cause I don’t think she’s incredibly Asian as much as Ally is unincredibly Asian… Either way, this grandma is the real!

This Year’s Recipient of sxsw’s HARDEST MF’ing ACT is…

… The Suzan, live from Japan. They came the realest, illest, and hardest at the Fool’s Gold party (located this year at Malverde, my favorite venue ever). The Suzan have two CDs, an EP: Suzan Kingdom and an LP: Suzan Galaxy. Check out this live performance of High and Low:

The Blonde Geisha: Combining Two Fetishes

Leave it to Asian fetishism to ruin a perfectly good trip to my local Borders Books. I was looking for books to spend my $25 gift card on when I spot this crap at the new books section:

What the??? Check out the description of the book, and you’ll start seeing how the author, Jina Bacarr, really really loves her some Orientals:

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