Quantico: Where the Brown Boys At?

I get it. Quantico is a pioneering show in multiple ways: most notably it’s the first American primetime drama to feature an Indian (and female) lead. Priyanka Chopra is indubitably the Mayor of Babesville, and I’m all for any show that has strong, kickass women of color — including Muslim hijabi twins who aren’t complete stereotypes (although this has been called into question). And complicated, tough gay characters who aren’t just planning weddings and snapping their fingers around – we need more of those too.

DOUGRAY SCOTT, AUNJANUE ELLIS, PRIYANKA CHOPRA, JAKE MCLAUGHLIN, JOHANNA BRADDY, GRAHAM ROGERS, YASMINE AL MASSRI, TATE ELLINGTON

But c’mon y’all — WHERE are the men of color? Granted, I’ve only seen a couple episodes, and maybe new characters were introduced, but the “top billed cast” on IMDb shows no men of color. Zero. And the optics of that bugs the hell out of me.

Indeed, Chopra and Yasmine Al Massri and Aunjanue Ellis and Annabelle Acosta provide plenty of eye candy, but I’m sick of all these Captain America Wonderbread types abounding. Four out of the five female leads are women of color, can’t we get ONE hot brown man for me the characters to lust after and have sexual tension-filled exchanges in the co-ed bathroom and get freaky with in the front seat of an SUV? Or will this go the way of The Mindy Project, with no men of color ever entering the fuckable orbit?

Oh wait, there’s this guy(?):

helloinback

Hello? Can someone tell me where the craft services table is at?

It’s only Season 1, there’s still time to assemble a proper hottie special agent dream team. Get it together, Quantico!

 

 

Durian Tourism….made in Oregon

coupledurians

Well, isn’t this precious? There’s a new Très Exotique durian tourism venture, brought to you from a young hip white couple from Eugene, Oregon. Because of course it is and of course they are. White privilege +  disposable income + a dash of Columbus complex….Oh, the places you’ll go!

Some choice bits from the NPR (again, OF COURSE) feature:

“What if a single taste of one fruit — in this case, the durian — changed the course of your entire life?

The moment (2009) Gasik and Culclasure inhaled the fruit’s gassy aroma of fermented pineapple and onion and tasted its cool, creamy, vanilla-flavored flesh, they were hopelessly hooked. Now, after years of traveling through Southeast Asia tracking down and eating durian almost daily, they have become experts on the fruit. And for other travelers who catch durian fever, Gasik has written a durian travel guide to Thailand , which comes out in June….

“It’s very sensual — the thorny texture, intense aroma, bizarre appearance and amazing range of flavors found in no other fruit or natural food,” Gasik tells us by email from Bangkok. “Durian is the only fruit in the world that I know of that combines a very high sugar content with a high fat content. It’s like crème brûlée on a tree.”…

Since the couple departed for Asia in 2012 to pursue durians nearly full-time, they’ve eaten the fruit in 13 countries, including Malaysia, Vietnam, Myanmar and Australia.

And even Gasik and Culclasure have more new durians to taste. This summer, they’re hoping for a chance at “elephant dung durian.”

Elephants often eat fallen durians off the ground, Gasik explains, and sometimes the entire fruit manages to pass through the animal unbroken. The flesh of these durians supposedly goes through a further ripening process that amplifies the taste.

“There’s a guy in Malaysia who says he’ll have some in July,” Gasik says. “I’m really, really excited.”

CBruhs: BARF LOOK AT THESE HIPPIES. Tripping all over themselves to scoop elephant poopfruit into their maws. Who can just up and leave to the other side of the world to eat fruit all damn day?? WHITE PEOPLE. And why can’t durian just be durian and not compared to creme brulee in order to somehow “translate” it? Who do you think knows what the texture and aroma of creme brulee is even like?? OTHER WHITE PEOPLE. You wouldn’t say potato is the daikon of Europe…or something. Actually maybe you would say something like that AZN.

AZN: At least it’s really durian and not a euphemism for a sex tour.

CBruhs: If it was 2 white dudes I would be suspicious that it really was. Well, he did describe durian as a “sensual” fruit. What does that even mean? So what would be a “not sensual” fruit…like a cranberry? Something from Europe obviously because only Asian fruits can be sessy fruits. Anyhoo I’m personally more interested in the Russell Wong Joy Luck Club Watermelon Tour. Coming soon to such exotic locales as your local Ranch 99.

 

Thanks Char Char!

Foxconn Tour

There’s nothing I love more than communist propaganda films that don’t seem like government or pseudo-government funded films. My favorite of course is the first No Reservations with Bourdain in Vietnam. The second? This new Foxconn video of how nice and safe it is in iPhone-land. Will this make me buy or not buy an iPhone? You tell me. I tend to have this debate often with my white coworkers who always get a little awkward with me when I tell them this company would be welcomed with open arms in Vietnam and if you’re worried about Foxconn, you should be worried about the hundreds of other countries out there that DON’T have a Foxconn.

Friday Fuckery: T.G.I. Friday’s Korean Tacos

photo: T.G.I. Friday’s

We’ve all been goin’ ga-ga for Korean tacos over the past few years, from Roy Choi’s groundbreaking Los Angeles-based Kogi truck to Seattle’s Marination Mobile…and countless imitators. The latest of which is your favorite suburban binge-drinking office party spot, T.G.I.F.! Or, Thank Goddess It’s Fracking Time for Korean Tacos Hells Yes Hi-Five Brah!!!

If you want a little something extra to go with those Loaded Skillet (teehee) Nachos or that bowlful of Tuscan Spinach Dip (TM), these tacos are made with Black Angus steak and they’re served with Sriracha, ginger-lime slaw, cilantro, basil aaaaaand jasmine rice pilaf. Let’s just ram the whole of Southeast Asia and the Asian subcontinent in there for good measure — and kinda skip over most of the Korean ingredients thing…kimchi and kkakdugi smells may freak out the mall walkers, brah!

Regardless, I will probably still order this mess next time I’m by the Westfield. In mah belly, it’s always Friday (Fuckery)!

via Eater

Thanks Char!

Jason Wu Takes on ‘Asian’ Fashion

Young, successful Asian American designers like Jason Wu, Phillip Lim, and Thakoon Panichgul inevitably deal with being compared and lumped together, and with the expectation that their Asian heritage would result in some common aesthetic…”Asian” or otherwise.

Jason Wu, who designed one of First Lady Obama’s inauguration ball gowns and has a line out for Target, acknowledges that — despite what people may presume — the most well-known young Asian American designers haven’t until very recently incorporated Asian symbolism and/or stereotypes into their collections.

This overt “Asian trend” has been exhibited mainly (as it has like, every other year ad naseum) by white designers like Ralph Lauren (whose early 2011 runway show included “China Girl” in its soundtrack) and Louis Vitton:

Ralph Lauren photo: Fernanda Calfat/Getty Images

Louis Vitton photo: Imaxtree

In his fall 2012 show, Jason Wu made an intentional decision to showcase Chinese-influence designs: “I suppose this hasn’t really been done before—an Asian designer tapping into the Asian side. Usually, culturally, we stay away from it … I feel like I’m at a place where I’m maturing not just as a designer, but as a person, to embark on inspirations that hit close to home…I almost wanted to poke fun at it a little bit by interpreting it through stereotypes … but also by incorporating all of that in a way that is elegant and powerful at the same time.”

Props to Wu for recognizing the stereotypical and often offensive imagery typically seen in “Asian-inspired” fashion. But even if his new designs are intended to be subversive, will this message even register with the fashion world and its consumers, especially operating within the larger Yelloxploitation trend? Could Wu be dismissed as jumping on the Asian bandwagon (altho, fashion’s endless ethnic exploitation could hardly be called a trend) or even worse — validate the “Asian” pigeonhole people try to stick him in? (Phillip Lim also created a cheongsam-influenced collection in 2010)? What does it mean to step into a culturally-loaded space that you have both actively avoided and feel a need to claim, especially after seeing dominant culture co-opt it? Can change happen in this way, or is it just further legitimizing popular stereotypes? BUT IS IT ART, DARLING?? GAAAAAAAA.

Like Chinese character tattoos and Buddhism, “Asian” fashion may just be another thing white people ruined for the rest of us.

Sources: NY Magazine

Cheaters Get Elephant-Wanged

Here’s a heartwarming story out of Taiwan (complete with helpful CGI re-enactment, thanks to Next Media Animation!). A man from Taipei — who has been dubbed “Cheating Chen” — was caught by his wife and girlfriend after Chen posted a skanky pic on facebook (too easy). Instead of tearing each others’ hair out when discovering each other, the women decided to team up as a Dynamic Duo of Vengeance.

Their plan included slippin’ Cheatin’ Chen a mickey (his wife is a nurse) typing him to the bed, shearing his pubes and eyebrows, and drawing an elephant and the words “I’m a man-whore” on his naked body. Also may or may not have involved the wielding of knifes and bats, but I’ll buy Nurse Wang’s story that she was just using the bat as a back massager. Asian folks be doin’ that at times.  Resourceful.

Anyhoo, I disagree with the label that these ladies are “crazy”. Let them instead serve as models for how to handle those out on the creep: With a healthy dose o’ rope and manscapeage. Although I do feel the crotch-shaving thing should just be part of a standard maintenance regimen, fellas. Just sayin’.

via Buzzfeed

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