What Did Jeremy Lin Do?

Linsanity
Ever since JLin and the Lin family rolled to the Leavey Center for a Broncos v. Crimson game in 2010, AzN has been in full blown Linsanity mode. So for all you JLin fans out there who aren’t necessarily Laker fans (#DubNation represent) I will be conveniently posting JLin stat lines after every Laker game (0-5 and off to a great start y’all!) on the Asian American sports blog: datwinning.com. Peep BCB for some summaries of the best JLin games, but stick with Dat Winning for up-to-date stat lines cause we can’t be a 24/7 Jeremy Lin Show.

Also, thanks to High Expectations Father who kindly volunteered to give us a quote after each performance (to be honest, I didn’t ask, but my mom called me the other day and was like “High Expectations Father wants to talk to you!” so I drove out to the suburbs and, well, you know what happened next).

Thanks all! And remember, as Jeremy says, Jesus loves you! Unless you’re JR Smith, in which case, no one loves you.

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Arthur Chu: Social Justice Champion?

Did I really type that? I did indeed. Before I read a lil ole article in the Daily Beast that Arthur Chu penned, I just thought of him as the nerdy Chinese guy that everyone hated on Jeopardy cause he was winning a lot using Game Theory just chasing down Double Jeopardys. And cause he apparently isn’t good in the ‘outdoors’ and doesn’t watch ‘sports’, I assumed he knew nothing more than a little bit about everything a nerd would know: Game of Thrones, Presidents who fought in wars, mid-19th century poets, and Potpourri.

Teen-Jeopardy

But then the backlash got heated and the race card started coming up. Was it racism that made him an easy target? Even all-time Jeopardy great Ken Jennings thinks so. Did I expect Chu’s response would turn everything around and that he’d start dropping some politicized knowledge in response to all the negativity and the recent shootings in Ferguson and Florida? No I did not, and shit did I misjudge this guy. Forgive my initial ignorance, because he looked like every guy I went to Cal with (at Soda Hall) even though he writes like every grad student I saw with a clipboard on Sproul (that’s a compliment if you need to ask).

So do I want to know more about this guy? Hell yea. Did I jump at the chance when the producers of his new documentary wanted us to reach out to our folks to let them know about their kickstarter? Are you not reading this right now? You only have two weeks to contribute, so act fast. <Queue Jeopardy jingle here>.

There’s No Racism in the Future, or in Space.

ZOEI, like the thousands of Americans this month, watched Guardians of the Galaxy. And it was lovely. Halfway through the movie while I was figuring out why Zoe Saldana in green skin gave me a funny inside… a thought popped up entered my mind. Is there a movie Zoe Saldana’s been in that’s NOT set in space or in the future? Obviously, the first thought was, DUH! DRUMLINE. Still one of the best movies ever and easily some PEAK Nick Cannon. After that, nothing. Seriously, look at her IMDB and tell me you’ve seen anything NOT called Avatar, Star Trek, Guardians of the Galaxy or Drumline. I’m gonna go out on a limb right now and assume its because she’s “too ethnic” for a lot of Hollywood roles. But the craziest thing is all these movies set in the future just assumes racism will be WIPED OUT. And of course, in space, all current races are all over the universe (plus all the alien species the special effects folks can come up with). So what I’m asking you now is, if we expect the FUTURE to be all accepting of races and SPACE to be filled with EVERY race ever PLUS every species in the universe, can we just start being a little less racist RIGHT NOW and give Zoe Saldana some more non-alien roles set in present day Earth? Please? Sadly, I have a feeling that’s gonna be rough, cause every fanboy from San Diego to Spartax wants her to do the next 10 Star Treks, 5 Avatars, and 20 Guardians of the Galaxies.

 

The Most Baddest US Senator Gets His Due

Forgive me if I didn’t catch the Daniel Inouye storyline in Ken Burn’s The War. I only heard of the badassness of Inouye via Comedy Central’s all-too-good Drunk History series (have you read how the man lost his arm? I could never have imagined it was like THIS). Between marrying a Ford Foundation board chair and serving Hawaii for 58 years as an elected official, I can see no better way of having his legacy honored than being portrayed by the illustrious Steven Yuen of killing-zombies and dating-farmers-daughters fame. Enjoy, and we’ll surely be posting the other parts when they’re released:

BROS! WE OWN HIP HOP RIGHT NOW!

BROS! We did it. I can’t believe it. Ever since the first day I bought my Young Black Teenagers maxi-single, I have waited for this day. Come on, you remember YBT right???

That’s right, tap the bottle and twist the cap! Cause the rap game has been taken over. And by taken over, I mean the best rappers in the world are white, just like yours truly, Chad McDougal, part-time cell phone salesmen and part-time community college PE majorer, and ohyea my county’s greatest rapper. I’ve won cyphers at my dad’s law firm’s annual Easter Sunday breakfast and I’ve won impromptu freestyle rap competitions at underground TGIF back parking lots. So you better believe I know it when a takeover has, uh, taken over. Check it:

Greatest rapper in the game right now? You guessed it:

Greatest female rapper on the top of your charts right now?

URGH I WISH I WAS SWAGGY P, getting all up in Iggy like that! Wait, hang on, I just got a call.

Hello? What was that bro? Swaggy P, I mean Nick Young is what? He’s not… uh, what? Oh. Damn. 

Wait, I take back what I said about Swags P. I always wanted to be Kevin Love, I’ve told y’all from the very beginning! These are crazy times, y’all. No black musicians made the Billboard Top 100’s 2013 top track list for the first time since 1958. I’m not racist yo, I swear. But I just gotta say, its nice and refreshing to see people who look  like me finally singing, I mean spitting the rap game, that I like. See, Eminem agrees:

PHEW: Fresh Off the Boat Might Actually Be Good and Not Offend Us All

Just when I thought the ABC adaptation of Eddie Huang’s Fresh Off the Boat autobiography (BCB Book Review HERE) could end up as the next All American Girl… Surprise, surprise, we get a respectable Asian American version of Chris Rock’s Everybody Hates Chris. Set in the 90s in Orlando just like the book (PLEASE GOD DO NOT CHANGE ANYTHING SIGNIFICANT FROM THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY) and starring a kid who might be a bit too skinny to be a young Eddie Huang, F.O.B. looks like one of those shows that’ll make you think you’re laughing at Asian folks, when in fact you’re laughing at Asian folks making fun of white people. The line between funny or racist is a dangerous and ambiguous one (see any NBC sitcome vs any CBS sitcom), and I don’t always condone Asian American actors doing really really really really bad fake Taiwanese accents, but this shit was based on the life and times of the great Eddie Huang, so calm down folks, and YES I know those are terrible Taiwanese accents. And if anything, they should have learned how to do some real Taiwanese accents, maybe not view a creepy Youtube tutorial on how to do a Taiwanese accent, but maybe learn from a vocal coach or something. (By the way, if you’re Asian American and your parents don’t have accents, you’re probably not reading BCB anyway. YEA I SAID IT.)

It really is going to be glorious watching Eddie rocking the 90s Orlando Magic Starter jackets and rolling around with a Walkman full of Wu-Tang. And the fact that its set in the 90s alone is going to make this show the beast that I know it can be. At a time where the one-camera, well-written, witty comedy is king, this show has the chance to go far. PLUS extra props for picking the hilarious Gov. Danny Chung from VEEP to be the dad and the super hot Constance Wu who’s role as an Asian American mom trying to fit in with the Real Housewives of Orlando could be a sitcom in itself. Here’s hoping for future-past flash forwards with Eddie Huang cameos cause a narration might not be enough. And I’m esp looking forward the very special episode: waiting in line at Foot Locker for Jordans episode.

EXTRA EXTRA: NEW FALL LINE UP MEANS JOHN CHO IS BACK FOR A NEW PILOT:

Yes this looks really bad. And what the F is up with Asian American actors on TV being forced to have Anglo names? Does John Cho look like a Henry Higgins? Does Lucy Lu have to be JOAN Watson in Elementary? Couldn’t she be Watson Chen? Wouldn’t that be more realistic?