Ralph Lauren’s USA Outfits are Made in China!

OH NO! Team USA outfits for the 2012 Olympics are Made in China! Did you know that? Isn’t that crazy? I mean, look how AMERICAN this looks. Hey can we include a photo of 3 dudes dressed like they’re going to America’s Cup as if it was still in Newport, Rhode Island and not the way the socialists in San Francisco will mess up the all-American tradition of a multi-million dollar yacht race? And oh yea, can you make one of the dudes Black? Oh shit, I forgot to ask for a female, I mean a girl on there. Shit, I mean a woman. Oh well, we’ll just photoshop one on there. Make sure she’s blonde though, and make sure there’s at least one white guy in between her and the Black guy. 

So yea, this is AMERICA folks. We should be wearing outfits MADE BY AMERICANS and DESIGNED BY AMERICANS. From when the first discus was thrown by a naked American at the first Olympics to the very last ping pong smashed by AMERICANS. umm, what did you say? All the American ping pong players are chineses what?. Wait, I didn’t mean Ping Pong, I meant SWIMMING. Yes, the very last stroke. So now to end… 

DUDE. Why did you just post this picture of a speed skator from Japan. What? He’s American? But look at his… Whatever, AT LEAST he’s wearing ALL-AMERICAN clothing. Look at the giant USA on his hat! Hey, can you look up that clothing brand on his vest? I don’t think I’ve seen a Roots retail store before. No, I have never been to LA, Denver, Utah, Detroit, do you think I’m crazy enough to leave the Bible Belt? What do you mean Roots is a Canadian brand that dropped the Canada in the Roots Canada brand to design Team USA outfits before Ralph Lauren got the contract? But at the very least the outfits are MADE in the US, yea? What? Roots Canada manufactures in India, Peru, China, Vietnam AND the United States? Hmm. Well, I’m sure the clothes were made in the US because the USOC Director of Licensing and Merchandising cares deeply about these issues. 

“It’s a very hip and progressive brand, with a great connection to youth and athletics,” said Chester Wheeler, the USOC’s director of licensing and merchandising. “I don’t think it really makes a difference where the clothes are manufactured. The important thing is that they supply our athletes with clothing that makes them proud to walk through the stadium.” -2001. 

Hmmm. Well, I kinda like Canadians more than the Chinese. Canadians at least look more like us than the Chinese do, which is probably why I didn’t get upset in 2002… 

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