Child prostitution joke? Check. Thai ladyboy hookers? It went there. THERE. As in, you see errrrryything. And there’s a healthy dose of nekkid ass nekkid shots of Thai strippers in the ending credits, to make sure you get your $11 bucks worth of exotic muffs ‘n’ weiners ‘n’ such (including the fabled ping-pong ball trick).
And Mr. Chow (Ken Jeong) is back with a vengeance — his opening scene consists of full frontal nudity showcasing his nubbin, which the bros had mistaken for some sort of worm.
What also put a burr in my ass was the role of Stu’s (Ed Helms) fiancee Lauren (Jamie Chung), who stood around like a pretty young thing, alternately keeping her head down and her mouth shut in the presence of her father or gazing with unconditional adoration at Stu, who she outranks 10:1 on the hotness meter. And even though Stu has a pesky penchant for hooking up with strippers — she’s cool with that, because that’s what real love is! Apparently these spiritless, ornamental qualities qualify Lauren as an “angel” in the eyes of the bros, with a “solid rack for an Asian”. Pure romance.
Another bland plot device was Lauren’s overachieving (but attractive!) brother Teddy (Mason Lee), who is missing for most of the movie. When he does get some screen time, he is humbly putting up with the antics and abuse of the bros, which eventually lead to a missing finger. But he’s cool with that, because the wolfpack showed him how breaking out of his model minority cage to become shitfaced and free of spirit is so worth it.
Oh and Lauren’s dad is presented as an overbearing asshole who dotes on his only son because he goes to Stanford and plays the cello. Too bad about that chopped off finger.
But most of all, Hangover II just wasn’t funny. Running almost two hours long, there was lots of random boring dialogue that struggled to revive the heyday of the first movie and convince the viewer what a hoot we’re all having. Remember that one time in Vegas and all those crazy things that happened at the last bachelor party? This is totally just like that! What a wild bunch of dudes these are, right? And you get to be in on it! Fun times, right? Right Bros??
Sorry, I probably would have had a better time at Kung Fu Panda 2.