Friday Fuckery: Tiger Escape!

In Japan, they take disaster training and emergency preparedness seriously, folks. Trainers at the Tama Zoo in Tokyo role-played what to do in the event of a tiger rampage, with over 70 zoo staff taking part in the drill. 26-year-old Shuhei Yamaguchi lost at that most powerful democratic tool known to man: rock-paper-scissors — and was stuck with the role of tiger-run-amok.

While the getup makes me feel like I’m at a high school basketball game waiting for the half-time dunk contest, Yamaguchi’s performance (which lasted over an hour) of enraged-turned-defeated creature is straight QUALITY. Just try not to whimper as they poke a stick at his limp Garfield body and wrap his fuzzy mascot ass all up in that net. SADS. Makes me wanna call up ASPCA. Someone get Sarah McLachlan on the phone, stat! Also, I wonder if Tama Zoo is hiring…

via nyc barstool sports

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