Radiohead Leaves Hannah Montana High and Dry

One more reason why I heart Thom Yorke. So much that, during a college acting course (shutup), while all the other students imitated easily guessable pop tarts like Backstreet Boys and Britney for a class exercise, I chose to flail and thrash around during the excruciatingly long intro to Idioteque in homage to the man, in front of 20+ befuddled whitehatters.

And I would do it again, in a heartbeat. Because Thom and Radiohead never fail to dole out verbal beatdowns to puny delusional mortals.

For instance! At the Grammys, when Miley Cyrus found out the band’s dressing room was four doors down, Miss ChinkyEyes immediately texted all her friends bragging that she had met “her rock gods.” Then she had her manager request a meeting with them. To which Radiohead replied: “Yeah, we don’t really do that.”

ACCESS DE-NIED, baby heffa!!! Radiohead does not suffer Fake Plastic tweens gladly (zing! C’mon).

Hoors shall not pass

Hoors masquerading as wholesome teenyboppers shall not pass.

But wait, it gets better: For Miley it was Knives Out (eh? eh?). She left before Radiohead’s performance, and whined during a precocious little tantrum on the airwaves that she was “gonna ruin them…I’m gonna tell everyone.”

Stinkin' meanie Radioheads! I (Disney PR)'ll show you!

Stinkin' meanie Radioheads! I (Disney PR)'ll show you!

To which Yorke cooly replied: “When Miley grows up, she’ll learn not to have such a sense of entitlement.”

AHAHAAAHAAHAAA Cyrus just got skooled!!! Although I doubt she’ll ever get too big for those privileged britches. For reals, what an assbrat. Miley –  ruin Radiohead?! Who’ve been putting out visionary and mindblowing records since she was sucking on her silver pacifier?

News flash hillbillstress – the only thing your lame rants do is make you look even more ridiculous and irrelevant. Ooh, you’re gonna tell EVERYbody? Like, the whooole entire Seaview High? Even Mr. Cornelly? Miley you’re sooo bad, I would just die! Are you and the Jonas Bros like gonna get together and boycott one of the greatest bands of all time, who’ve been nominated for over 38 music awards? Well, Radiohead’s never won the Kid’s or Teen’s Choice Awards, cuz they’re like wicked old! And when that boogerhead Thom asks you to junior prom next year, you’ll be all like NO WAY! LOSER! and then he’ll really be sorry.

Understandably, Radiohead did not want to turn their dressing room into an Idioteque (Haaooo! Hello?) And while it makes my bowels churn to learn that that overgrown Bratz doll and I like(d) the same band, it makes me cackle like an old drag queen to know that Thom delivered such an exquisite Let Down. Everything is In Its Right Place. Hi-five! Anyone?


3 thoughts on “Radiohead Leaves Hannah Montana High and Dry

  1. Miley requesting a meeting with Radiohead is like Mary Magdalene asking for a word with the Prophets. (I will, from now on, insert secret Dan Brown-like biblical references into all my comments to subtlety convert sherdizz towards the Light) and props on “hillbillstress”, although I would have gone with debutrash. I’m just sayin’.


  2. Pingback: Jamie Foxx vs. Miley Cyrus « BicoastalBitchin’s Weblog

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